strictlysupreme Chapter 173 Self-deception
Chapter 173 Self-deception
"After your mother learned my identity, she hid in her room for two days and didn't want to see me. I thought she wanted to leave, so I helped her arrange everything. At least I could ensure that she would have enough food and clothing for the rest of her life."
"But she didn't leave me, and our lives are still the same as before."
A sweet and happy smile appeared on Yan Luoheng's face. "Gradually, I began to fear death. I rarely went on missions myself and spent more time with her."
"A few years passed by, and she grew into a graceful young lady."
"I know my identity. My hands are stained with blood, but she is different. She is clean and spotless. How can I bear to pollute her?"
"I wanted to send her abroad to study and see the world, but she refused without hesitation. She felt I was trying to get rid of her and even got herself drunk to make her position clear to me."
"She wants to stay with me and be with me forever."
Yan Luoheng paused again, a bitter smile appeared on the corner of his mouth, "At that moment I wavered, I agreed to her decision and let her stay with me."
"But my world and hers are ultimately incompatible. The more she knows and sees, the more she will be put in danger. So at the last moment, I convinced myself to let her go."
"I bought her a house in her name alone, and some equity promissory notes, enough for her to use for a lifetime, but I rarely show up anymore."
"Until one day, your grandfather found her."
At that time, he should have been happy for her, but his possessiveness made him feel that someone wanted to take away her love for him.
There was even a moment when he wanted to take her to find Bai Zhanwang and tell him that he was the one who could take care of her for the rest of her life.
But he didn't do that. It was a good thing that there was one more person who loved her in the world.
"She suddenly became the daughter of the Bai family. She seemed to have noticed my alienation and coldness, and she said she wanted to see me one last time."
"After that night, she said she would never look for me again and that she would marry a man who treated her well."
Yan Luoheng laughed at himself and said, "Two months later, I got the news that she was getting married. At that time, I was so jealous that I almost went crazy and almost took people to kill that man."
Qiao Xi couldn't help but say, "That man is Qiao Guangyuan."
"Yes, it's him." Yan Luoheng's eyes were filled with hatred that could not be concealed. "I thought your mother really wanted to marry him. How could I ruin her happiness? On their wedding day, I secretly hid where she couldn't see me and witnessed her become someone else's wife with my own eyes."
"I thought she had let go of her feelings for me, but it turned out I was the one who couldn't let go."
"One day I went to peek at her and found out she was pregnant. Later she gave birth to a girl, but I calculated the time and found that the child was not hers and Qiao Guangyuan's."
"It's my child and hers."
Qiao Xi clenched her hands unconsciously, she didn't believe it!
The hatred in Yan Luoheng's eyes gradually faded, and a happy smile appeared on his face. "You don't know how excited and thrilled I was at that time. How much I wanted to run to her and tell her that I was willing to give up everything for her and just want to take her and the child away."
"But what I saw was a happy family of three. I even saw a long-lost happy smile on her face."
"I resisted my impulses and desires and chose to protect her happiness."
"During those years, I was like a peeping Tom, constantly spying on her happiness and your every move. I knew when you started talking and when you started walking. I even knew the first time you called me daddy. How I wished that I was the one you called daddy."
"Seeing her so happy, my heart gradually calmed down, but I never thought that one day, she would be killed in a car accident!"
"At first, Qiao Guangyuan acted so heartbroken, I thought it was an accident. But not long after, he brought back the mother and daughter. In an instant, I..."
"I don't know how to describe that feeling. It was hatred, pain, and..." Yan Luoheng tried his best to suppress the rage that was gushing out. "I increasingly suspected that the car accident was not an accident, so I ordered people to investigate the truth of the accident at all costs."
"Did you find out?" Qiao Xi asked.
Yan Luoheng replied affirmatively: "Yes, I found it."
"when."
"Eight years ago."
Hearing this answer, Qiao Xi smiled, "And then you still pretend nothing happened."
"No." Yan Luoheng stood up excitedly and paced back and forth anxiously. "I want to kill him myself. I've even arranged for someone to do it."
"But I saw you. I saw you spending his birthday with him. Your eyes were full of him as your father. It seemed like you couldn't leave him at all."
"I can't let you become an orphan, I..." Yan Luoheng looked at Qiao Xi distressedly, "I've also thought that it wouldn't be a bad thing if the Bai family could take you back, but you don't have a good relationship with your grandfather and uncles. I'm afraid you can't bear such a blow, so I want to slowly let you know the truth."
"I have been watching you secretly all these years. Daddy will never allow anything to hurt you."
"Enough!" Qiao Xi didn't want to hear his high-sounding excuses.
Even if what he said was true, she would not recognize him.
Yan Luoheng sat down again, and said with a guilty conscience, "Xiao Xi, Dad knows I owe you too much. I will do my best to make it up to you."
"I don't need your compensation." Qiao Xi sneered, "You don't need to make any excuses for your selfishness."
"Compared to the power of the leader of Tiansha Sect, you will not give up all of this for your mother."
"I do." Yan Luoheng said without hesitation.
Qiao Xi taunted, "Your wish is to push her away from you?"
Until this moment, Yan Luoheng still said self-righteously: "I am afraid that she will be involved in this. I am afraid that she will be in danger if she stays with me."
Qiao Xi didn't know if he really didn't understand or was pretending not to understand, "She knew your identity, but she still wanted to stay with you. Doesn't she know there will be danger?"
"She may have ten thousand reasons to leave you, but she loves you, and life and death are no longer within her consideration."
"Rather than being separated from the one I love, I would rather live and die with him." Qiao Xi said firmly.
In an instant, Yan Luoheng's defense was broken, "Xiao Xi..."
Qiao Xi felt that there was nothing more to say to him. "I should go now. He must be worried after I've been missing for so long."